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It Never Happened


It Never Happened (or State Terror in Eight Easy Stages) comprises eight short plays, thematically linked: a young journalist discovers integrity doesn’t pay the mortgage; a political fixer makes an awkward sex scandal disappear; four Nazis partake in the dinner party from hell; a pair of Tommies reflect on the prospect of their imminent death; a struggling sculptress must decide how much she’s prepared to suffer for her art; a domestic assault turns into a witchcraft trial; a wealthy Catholic seeks to reclaim the body of an executed priest and, finally, a teenage queen of England cultivates a passion for a man which could easily result in her death.


Torben Betts’ new play, commissioned as a showcase for final-year drama students, is a furious and darkly funny indictment of capitalist psychopathy and examines the price the individual has often had to pay when in conflict with the will of the patriarchal state.

It Never Happened was first performed on 14th May 2019 at the Arts Educational Theatre School, London. The cast was as follows:

I. The Free Liberal Media
WICKHAM, Lizzie Back
SNIDE, Anna Warke
YOUNG, Colette O’Brien

II. A Civil Servant’s Shoes
SWINTON, Charlie Derrar
PRUDHOE, Danny Sykes
DUNS, Joshua Miller-Cundy
PAXTON, Phoebe Delikoura

III. The Mother of All Conspiracy Theories
DIETER, Michael Workeye
FRIEDA, Leah Shine
HEINRICH, Joshua Miller-Cundy
LOTTE, Colette O’Brien
MAX, Danny Sykes

IV. Old Men Talking, Young Men Dying
FRANK, James Westphal
ARTHUR, Ben Castle-Gibb
JULIET, Hannah Richardson
BEATRICE, Shelby Carling

V. Pointing Towards the Future
ANNA-MARIE, Lizzie Back
LUDWIG, Ben Castle-Gibb
OTTO, Joshua Miller-Cundy
LARA, Anna Warke

VI. Punching Down in Patriarchal Systems
SIR PHILIP, Charlie Derrar
LADY MARY, Shelby Carling
LUCY, Rachel Nwokoro

VII. The Things We Do For Love
HACKER, Michael Workeye
MRS FITZWILLIAM, Hannah Richardson
JOHNS, Leah Shine

VIII. Bloody Women
KATHERINE, Phoebe Delikoura
THOMAS, James Westphal
SIR ROBERT, Ben Castle-Gibb

Director, Alex Thorpe
Designer, Anna Reid
Lighting, Sam Waddington
Sound, Eamonn O’Dwyer

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